I am a Christian who moved away from Jesus and then Jesus brought me back.
My love for God has increased so much after I realized how loving He is. I used to pray a lot from childhood and always felt a connection to the Father God.Maybe it was having a very prayerful mother. But I guess praying does bring a lot of tests. When I was 13 I was molested and then it sort of shattered my faith. I was angry with everyone at this point. I didn't want to live and even woke up crying one night and decided to kill myself.I remember thinking let me ask God because I don't do anything big in my life without asking God and being brought up in a Christian household I knew without a doubt I would go to hell for suicide, I switched on the television and decided to see what God has to tel me on a Christian channel. It was such an utter wonder because as I saw there sat a group of people speaking about abuse and I felt God made this show just for me. That was the first time, it dawned on me that there were others in the world who have been through this same trial and survived. Little by little He removed my anger and started speaking to me. I used to spend more time in prayer. During my school days I used to have stalkers following me home back from school. Once I remember this voice speaking to me, " LOOK DOWN, WALK SLOW, DON'T RUN". I listened to God's voice that day and my life was saved from so much bad. Soon I started going to college, I got so busy with friends l that I stopped praying. I didn't realize that I made a mistake. But then sin started entering my life.I committed the worst sin possible. I figured God would understand because He loved me.He knew I was happy so He would understand for sure.Those were my thoughts!
1 Corinthians 6: 9, " Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders"
Romans 1: 26 "For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature."
I ended up getting into a relationship with my best friend and tried getting out of it twice but failed miserably. I remember kneeling down, bowing my head in prayer in a Church and asking Jesus for forgiveness and asking Him to make me good. Then one year from then God put me in a hostel room with three Christians and I saw them read the Bible and spend time in prayer everyday. They would individually pray everyday. This created a very big impact on me. A major one. I missed Jesus so much. So I started reading the Bible as well. I made it a practice to not go to bed without reading the Bible once everyday. I could feel God speaking to me guiding me and helping me with my problems. Before I knew it the Holy Spirit filled me with power and I didn't sin anymore. I suddenly felt nothing. Before it was JUST ME who tried to stop sinning now I could stop with ease.God is so powerful.Luke 15: 10, "In the same way, I tell you, there is joy in the presence of God's angels over one sinner who repents."
For the last 5 years I have lived a life of prayer and close walk with Jesus, nothing would be possible without Him. If Jesus would do this much for me, how much more would He do for you. Not that I was special, its just that He is our amazing loving Father God. I love Jesus so much, I could never love anyone more. Jesus had asked me to choose between Him and the relationship I had previously. I chose Jesus and look what He has done for me.He has given me more love than I could have got from anyone and He has healed every wound of mine.
